30 March 2012

There's a Better Way Than Backbiting

I've noticed how amazing it is when someone compliments me when I’m doing something good at work. It does not have to be much, but just saying a few words is enough to make my whole day just that much better. I am encouraged to work hard for the rest of the day—assuming that it was a true compliment and not just a hollow and manipulative ruse to get me to work harder in which case the “compliment” will have the opposite effect on me. And of course , when someone is overly critical of me and misjudges my motives or actions, it becomes difficult to muster the previous enthusiasm I had and keep working.

Being complimented, being appreciated for what you do is a vital to every person  to varying extents, but even to the least degree, still very strongly needed. So then, why are honest compliments so rare. There is plenty of good things done to deserve credit. Yet, one would have better luck finding palm-trees in the desert than finding the deserved appreciation and credit deserved. If the only thing lacking in a workplace was  genuine and sincerely expressed appreciation to encourage one another on, work would still be quite tolerable. Yet, silence is never the case, rather there is slanderous backbiting and perpetual belittlement—a whirring mess of clouded contempt-filled words. Not only does working around people for the most part mean forsaking the hope of receiving earned recognition, but it also means enduring a never ceasing volley of insults and quips designed and catered to hurt not help.

Chalk it up to faulty human nature.

I aim to reject the demands and desires to follow the followers and chase after a better way. I can’t fix everything, but every person around is an opportunity to break down the pattern of harsh retorts and restore some kindness in people. Who knows, maybe people will start sowing what they receive. Maybe people will start giving encouraging words . Certainly without a change the same intolerable cruel tidal wave will continue to self-perpetuate and continue  to push people down rather than rise them up. There needs to be a change. 

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