It struck me as odd this morning in my daily reading and
meditation of several Bible passages how biased the typical view of love is.
It’s as though there are two main groups of people within Christianity—at least
that are most noticeable—there are those who are loving to everyone and then
there are those who are loving to everyone. I will clarify what I mean by that
in just a moment, but let me first say that both are very sincere and trying
oftentimes with a lot of heart and effort to do the right thing. I’m not trying
to put anyone down, I’m trying to put down a misunderstanding with the hope of
lifting people up by sharing an insight.
So now for the clarification that I promised a few sentences
ago. What I meant in saying that there are two groups of people that are by
definition, trying to do the same thing, was that both views are right in that
they recognize that love is the right answer. However, both have a different
understanding of what love is or what it is to be loving to people. Me, being a
very disagreeable sort of thinker, I am saying that both are off the mark of
what it is to be loving and that love is really a balance between the two
extremes set by the two groups.
Ok, the two perspectives. The first one is that love is the
answer to everything. No matter what a person says or does, the right thing to
do is always to love them. They believe that love means looking past and beyond
every poor decision, sin, and to never be judgmental. After all, we can’t walk
in their shoes. People with this understanding of love stand on the conviction
that this view of love and their treatment of people eliminates errors though
it’s strength and ability to overcome. Love is the answer. Some Christians take
it as far as to sound like a certain group from the 70’s that spoke of peace
and love, man. The people who truly live this love are admirable in so many
ways, the ability to overlook wrongs and the heart of compassion and mercy is
an amazing testament to their obedience to do what they believe is right in
complete disregard of conflicting pressures. They completely go against the
grain of the culture that drives like a machine to find and fix problems—even in
people.
The other perspective is the converse of the first one.
These people like to fix sin and people. This frame of mind is one that seeks
to build and design love in life and in the lives of others though disciplined
head-on collision with errors, confronting them one by one and eliminating
them. There is no mercy for sin. A thief should be punished so that the pain of
his actions will testify strongly against the error and thereby persuade a
change in heart. Righteousness may be a gift from God, but as God’s children we
have an obligation to be righteous in word and deed. If we are dead to sin,
then sin must be put to death with prejudice—and quickly too. If we are
sanctified by God, we should not take God’s commands lightly and we should be
fully sanctified in our actions and thoughts. Anyone who sins may be treated as
sin, and whatever is necessary to defeat the sin—that is necessary. This frame
of mind is honest and upfront about sin, and courageously confronts sin in all
forms to weed it out.
We’ve all seen both of these views of love and seen the value
of each in different circumstances. From the Bible we know that Jesus did the
will of his Father perfectly. In all things he submitted himself to God to the
point of death on the cross. So then, looking at Jesus should show us what love
looks like. Jesus’ life if painted would be a portrait of perfect love. It so
happens that we have a portrait of that life though the gospels that illustrate
vividly the love that God intends for us to have in our own lives. Let’s take a
look at that picture.
I recommend reading the gospels as books sometime if you
never have. The Bible was not originally diced up in bite sized verses and
chopped into chapters. It was written as books. Short books albeit in many
cases, but still books and I don’t think that reading a few verses here and
there is ever going to reveal God’s wisdoms that he wants to speak to us in the
scripture. Reading and meditating on verses and chapters is certainly
important. God’s word is highly complex and requires the attention to detail
that studying it provides, but it’s also important to take a step back and look
at the word as a whole from time to time.
When we take that step back and look at love from a distance
in the gospels, what does Jesus’ life tell us that love is? Some like to point
out that he did not throw the first stone. Others after reading the same
passage will point out that he told her to sin no more. Some will point out
that Jesus would eat with sinners that others would not dare to, then people
will point out the way that Jesus spoke to the Pharisees and the Sadducees is
very harsh and correcting—even condemning at times. Either saying that Jesus
walked around and just harshly judged people all the time is not the full
story, and neither is the idea that Jesus accepted everyone as they were and
that was fine no matter what they did he would be their friend. When the rich
man walked up to Jesus and asked what was keeping him from getting into the
kingdom of heaven, Jesus didn’t say, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll forgive you
even if you do love money more than me. It’s fine.” No, Jesus confronted the
man on the issue. But also notice that he didn’t beat the man over the head
with the guilt. He told him what he needed to do, and the man went away
sorrowful because he was so rich and didn’t want to give it up. Jesus softly
told the man what was necessary. Presumably the man went away and did not do
what Jesus had told him he needed to do.
In an odd way, love does not always trump sin. Jesus was
loving to everyone and he still ended up being tortured and murdered horribly
on a cross with criminals—who he also loved. Jesus maintained his stance and
devotion to God and the Truth. He spoke that truth to people and asked them to
listen to take its guiding hand and walk in the Truth. He tolerated sin in
people offering forgiveness to those who had the heart to repent, but he did
not simply accept sin. However, he rejected sin most usually in a calm and
respectful way that would lead people to repentance rather than leave them
recoiling for shelter.
Being loving is very difficult and takes wisdom and
discernment. God says in James to pray if we need wisdom and He will give it to
us. We will never have a simple guide that tells us what to do in every
possible scenario. Rather, the right thing to do is to allow the spirit of God
to guide our hearts and direct our minds in accordance with God’s will. That is
the short and simple answer. We need at all times the knowledge and wisdom of
God working within our hearts and minds to guide us into a proper walk in love.
In the end, neither perspective is wrong and neither is
right. Rather, being loving is a complex mixture of both attitudes depending on
the situation. Rather than look for a simple guide to how to treat everyone—look
to God to supply you with the wisdom and discernment to act in love. He can and
will direct your heart.
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